It's the start of a new year, and for many, that means standing in front of the mirror, cataloging everything that is "wrong" with your body that you plan to fix this year. Well, I'm here to help you fix your mind about your body!
We will start by giving a basic definition of body image. Your body image encompasses your perceptions, beliefs, feelings, thoughts, and actions that pertain to your physical appearance. In essence, it’s your personal relationship with your body. I like this definition because you have a lot of control over those things if you’re using the right coping strategies.
The goal in my mind is to spend most of our time in a body positive or body neutral state. There is enormous societal pressure to look a certain way, so even the best of us will have insecurities that crop up from time to time.
Examples of negative body image
When people have a negative body image, there are many ways that manifests. We can be avoidant; for example, performing behaviors like avoiding buying new clothes or looking into mirrors, or intentionally trying to hide parts of our bodies. How many of you hide your bellies or refuse to wear shorts because you have thicker thighs or cellulite? All this does is communicate the message that your body is bad. The first time I wore a two-piece swimsuit, I was close to 400 lbs. I was inspired by Gabifresh, who had dropped on the scene as a fashion blogger and eventually started her own swimsuit line. It was liberating to let it all hang out. We are four-dimensional beings and it’s okay if our curves reflect that. Everything from a Megan Thee Stallion to Alfred Hitchcock silhouette is welcome!
Another negative body image style is conflictual. Are you constantly battling with your body and telling it that it needs to be something that it’s not? Does "I Wish" by Skee-Lo constantly ring in your head? Do you think if you were a little taller, that woman you’re crushing on would notice you? Do you have curly hair and wish it was straight? Or straight hair and wish it was curly? Are you more on the slender slide and want to be bigger?
Embrace yourself instead of trying to replace everything that makes you a unique human being. Fun fact, I was born with 7 birthmarks, one of which covers almost a third of my torso. I remember being in junior high and wishing that I had unmarked skin like every other girl I saw. If you looked at my yearbooks from high school, I wore a jacket every day—and I grew up in South Carolina, y’all! Now, I make off-color jokes about how I could never join a secret society or that if I ended up the victim in a true crime story, my body would be super identifiable. What changed? Those birthmarks are still there, but my perception changed over time,...
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