How to Overcome Fear of Failure

Have you ever wondered if you could do stand-up comedy? Start a small business? Become a YouTube star? Get into graduate school? Run for political office? What fun ideas for your life have you considered…and why haven’t you tried to go for it?

For many of us, the moat between us and something we want to try is usually made of a particular type of anxiety -- fear of failure. And this is not just something you and I experience. The most daring CEOs and charismatic performers will admit that they’ve felt this fear, too.

In fact, no matter how accomplished we are, how hard-working, and how talented, our lives are riddled with ways to fail: the social failure of being rejected, the romantic failure of a broken relationship, the professional failure of being fired, or even of not being promoted, or not becoming a smash hit when you release your next single...Even if we’re not dreaming that big, the possibility of everyday types of failures looms large. And the more we let this fear get in the way of us taking leaps, the smaller our world becomes. 

What to do in this minefield of possible failures? How do we move boldly forward so we can take the chances that may bring incredible rewards? This week, let’s examine “failure” up close, and find five tips for how to overcome our fear of it.

Tip #1: Be specific

You know how the scariest part of a scary movie is before you open the door to the attic, when your imagination runs wild about what horrors lie beyond? Once the monster is revealed, it loses a lot of the mystery, and you’re not as scared anymore. That’s because fear is worse when it’s vague. This includes fear of failure, which might sound like something all-encompassing: “Something bad might happen,” or “What if something goes wrong?” Suddenly, the ominous music starts to crescendo because everything holds potential for failure.

To fight this, define what “failure” really means to you. Perhaps:

• “My company will go under and I’ll have to file for bankruptcy.”
• “My great American novel will fail to get on The New York Times bestseller list.”
• “I’ll totally freeze up in front of the class during my final presentation and get an F.”

Once your fear is sufficiently narrowed, it becomes much easier to wrap your head around it. It might even sound so far-fetched that it starts to seem silly. Or, even if it is likely to happen, "failure" may not be as catastrophic as you originally thought.

Tip #2: Answer your “what if?” questions

Often, we’ll voice our worries with “what if” questions. These what-ifs are meant to be rhetorical, but to get over your fear of failure, go ahead and answer the question.

“What if I fail my...

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