The way we choose to discipline our child is a personal choice based on our parenting styles. Although many parents today refrain from spanking as a form of discipline, there is still something many of us do that can be just as harmful to our children—yelling.
Why is yelling harmful?
According to a study published in the journal Child Development, yelling (defined as shouting, cursing, or insult-hurling) may be just as detrimental as physical punishment to adolescents' long-term well-being. Even in otherwise loving homes, yelling, cursing, or insults can have many of the same effects as hitting and can lead to depression, anxiety, and low self-esteem in kids.
My parents were not yellers, so in the rare instance when one of them did lose their cool, not only did it grab my attention, but I never forgot it. Remembering the impact yelling had on me when I was growing up, I felt awful whenever I grew impatient and attacked my kids verbally.
Thankfully, yelling doesn't have to be the norm. Here are seven ways to keep your voice and tone in check so you can make your interactions peaceful, not combative, the next time you lose your patience with your cherubs.
1. Parent as though someone is always watching
One of my worst parenting moments happened many years ago when I was making dinner. I asked my son to put the dog out so I could pull the ribs out of the oven without him jumping all over me. My son dutifully complied but left the door open, so the moment those ribs came onto the counter, the dog flew back and grabbed them. It was an honest mistake, but I was furious and screamed at my son and everyone else in the house.
From that night on, I decided never to embarrass my kids or myself like that again.
My yelling was terrible enough, but what I didn't realize was that a neighbor had been standing at my front door the entire time. It was horrifying, and I still shudder when I recall it all these years later.
From that night on, I decided never to embarrass my kids or myself like that again. So I began reminding myself to parent like someone was always watching. I've gotten myself into the habit of visualizing our school principal or one of my inlaws near the vicinity when I'm in a stressful situation with my kids. It helps me to remain calm and talk peacefully instead of acting out in a fit of rage.
2. Tune in to your yelling triggers
...
Keep reading on Quick and Dirty Tips
Tidak ada komentar:
Posting Komentar