5 Ways to Deal with Entitled People

Lately, for whatever reason, I’ve been hearing a lot about entitled people.

Earlier this week, a journalist emailed me and told me they were working on a piece on sleep. They requested detailed answers to a bunch of questions. They didn't ask whether I had time to answer them, nor did they say "please" or "thank you." They just expected my answers by the end of the day.

The next day, I heard from a coworker she'd waited three hours for a client who stood her up. This was after the client had demanded to meet in person, even though everyone else was doing virtual appointments. Then, for a whole afternoon, he continually texted that he was running late ... before finally no-showing because the appointment turned out to be inconvenient for him.

Entitlement is a person's belief that they are inherently deserving of privileges or special treatment.

Finally, I’ve been lending an ear to professor friends who are in the midst of a semesterly ritual—dealing with students who haggle for grades. One friend said that a Freshman attended her virtual office hours and said, “You gave me a B on my paper. I don’t get Bs. I need you to change this to an A.”

What do all these people have in common? Entitlement.

Entitlement is a person's belief that they are inherently deserving of privileges or special treatment. Some people wear their entitlement like a crown—they’re rude, demanding, contemptuous, and they get resentful, not just disappointed, when things don’t go exactly their way. But sometimes it’s more subtle—all you’re left with is a gut feeling that you’re being manipulated.

4 signs that a person is acting entitled

Not sure if you’re facing a reasonable request or an entitled demand? Don’t let an entitled person gaslight you into thinking that you’re the one way out of left field. Look for these four signs.

1. They think they're better than you

Let’s start with the big one. Entitled individuals genuinely think they're better or more important than others. Making a request at someone else’s expense, with no sense that their request might be inappropriate, definitely qualifies as entitled.

2. They hold double standards for themselves and others

Entitled people think nothing of inconveniencing others. They'll do things like canceling at the last minute, no-showing appointments, or requiring lots of others people’s time and effort to get a task done.

Entitled people think nothing of inconveniencing others.

But turn the tables and it’s a different story. Entitled people accept favors without returning them. They freeload. They...

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