How to Motivate Your Child: 5 Positive Strategies

I grew up the oldest of five siblings and was used to being a “take charge” kind of kid, even in young adolescence. So maybe it was my birth order that paved my ambitious drive to do extra chores around the house and score paying jobs at the age of 12. Whatever the case, I was a “mover and a shaker” and definitely not a couch potato.

My younger brothers and sister followed suit when it came to venturing into the workforce and earning a paycheck. All five of us had part-time jobs by the age of 15, and if we weren’t working at a pizza place or babysitting, we asked our parents what we could do around the house to earn a few bucks and buy things we knew they weren’t going to provide just because we wanted them. (Imagine that?)

Of course, my experience growing up isn't the same as the one kids face today. According to the Bureau of Labor Statistics, between April and July 2020 the number of employed youth 16 to 24 years old increased by a whopping 4.4 million to 17.5 million. So, going out and getting a summer job to keep busy and earn an income isn't an easy option for many young people. For those too young to join the workforce, there are plenty of distractions to compete for their attention, from chat apps to video games to TikTok.

So, how do we parents keep our kids motivated and engaged instead of hunkered over an electronic device? Here are five tips to try!

Tip #1: Expect your child to contribute when it comes to pricey items

Growing up, I remember how frustrated my siblings and I would feel when we asked my parents for a pair of trendy sneakers or money for something costly like a concert ticket or a new piece of electronic equipment. (Cell phones were nonexistent back then!) The request seemed simple enough, but my parents had other ideas. Instead, the answer was always "What can you do to help contribute to the cost of this?"

Dr. Ruth Peters, a psychology contributor to NBC's TODAY show and author of Overcoming Underachieving, agrees with my parent's philosophy. She says:

Daily in my practice, I see parents who have made the mistake of not taking the time and attention to teaching their children to be workers and achievers. These kids have learned to settle for less rather than to face and challenge adversity, to become whiners rather than creative problem solvers, and to blame others for perceived slights and lack of success.

Dr. Ruth Peters, "7...

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