Not Feeling Valued at Work?

You’re doing your thing at work – you’re hitting goals, making magic, keeping the train on the tracks, and … [birds chirping]. Where, you’re wondering, is the love? The pat on the back, the feeling of being recognized for your effort and achievements?  Does your company value you?

Feeling underappreciated at work can be painful. We spend roughly a third of our lives working. Shouldn’t we feel good about what we’re doing there all those hours?

If you’ve been feeling like your hard work is going unnoticed and underappreciated, then let’s talk about what you can do to reclaim your value.

Tip #1: Find your professional “Love language”

Nearly 30 years ago, relationship counselor and author Gary Chapman published The 5 Love Languages. In this book, Chapman explains that each of us expresses – and wants to receive affection in different ways. And understanding how we choose to receive that affection is critical.

Personally, my love language is Acts of Service. This means that when my husband wants to woo me, he knows that dropping off my dry cleaning or getting my cracked phone screen repaired will mean more to me than gifts of flowers or candy ever could. These, for me, are the greatest expressions of love. But he only knows this because I’ve told him so.

Too much information? Perhaps. But I believe the same concept applies in the workplace. Not in terms of affection, but rather recognition. In order to feel more appreciated, it’s important that you understand what your version of appreciated looks and feels like. 

So ask yourself this question: When do I feel valued? What has someone said or done to leave me feeling this way?

Some of us may be seeking a private thank you, while others want public recognition. Some feel appreciated upon receiving an award or spot bonus, while others strive to have their opinions sought out.

There are no wrong answers here, so be honest with yourself.

In order to feel more appreciated, it’s important that you understand what your version of appreciated looks and feels like.

Tip #2: Expand your view of recognition

So now you understand how you like to feel valued or recognized. But before you go ringing the alarm bells, ask yourself – is it possible that you are being recognized, but not in the ways you’re looking for?

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