When a child acts out and demonstrates defiant behavior, there's usually an underlying reason. Maybe your child is seeking attention, testing boundaries, or frustrated about school or her social life. Taking the time to understand why your child is acting out is often a big part of finding the solution.
Could you be dealing with oppositional defiant disorder?
First, make sure your child's behavior isn't an ongoing pattern. Oppositional defiant disorder (ODD) isn't just a buzzword, it’s something very real that 1 to 16 percent of children and their parents struggle with. Here's how the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry defines ODD.
Oppositional defiant disorder (ODD) is one of a group of behavioral disorders called disruptive behavior disorders (DBD). These disorders are called this because children who have these disorders tend to disrupt those around them. ODD is one of the more common mental health disorders found in children and adolescents.
Physicians define ODD as a pattern of disobedient, hostile, and defiant behavior directed toward authority figures. Children and adolescents with ODD often rebel, are stubborn, argue with adults, and refuse to obey. They have angry outbursts and have a hard time controlling their temper.
A child with oppositional defiant disorder:
- Has frequent temper tantrums
- Argues constantly with adults
- Refuses to do what is asked of an adult
- Always questions rules and refuses to follow rules
- Does things to annoy or upset others, including adults
- Blames others for his/her own misbehaviors or mistakes
- Is easily annoyed by others
- Often displays an angry attitude
- Speaks harshly or unkindly
- Seeks revenge or acts vindictively
Any child can act out from time to time, but children with ODD show a constant pattern of hostility and defiance, usually aimed at people in authority like parents or teachers. Their behavior interferes with learning and school activities.
If you suspect your child may have ODD, seek guidance from your child's doctor or a mental health professional.
How to parent a defiant child
If your child is like most kids and has occasional periods of defiance, there are things you can do to make things easier. I discovered eight strategies that helped me with my own brood. By following these techniques, you too can survive your child's maddening moments.
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