After many years of infertility, my first four kids were born within four years! Having waited for so very long to finally become a mom, my first milestone holidays—Thanksgiving, Christmas, Mother’s Day, and those momentous first birthday celebrations—were something I didn’t take for granted.
In fact, looking back, I’d say I probably went a bit over the top when it came to their birthdays. I picked a theme and then went hog wild. Circuses, carnivals, Pooh Bear, the Hundred Acre Wood, the Wizard of Oz, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory...the themes went on and on.
Those parties were memorable (as well as tiring, expensive, and time-intensive), but as my kids got older, I learned quickly that it wasn’t the actual party that got them so excited about a birthday. It was the fact that their birthday was a special day devoted just to them.
Celebrating them individually, with the focus entirely on them, mattered much more than all the hoopla of a big birthday bash. Equally as important was the excitement we’d create days before the actual birthday. After all, anticipation is half the fun.
Here are five ways you can make your child’s birthday a blast without (or in addition to) the big fuss of a party.
5 Non-Traditional Ways to Celebrate Your Child's Birthday
- Start a Family Birthday Tradition
- Make a Birthday Date
- Plan a Mystery Day
- Get Sporty
- Book a Destination Birthday
Here's a closer look at each.
1. Start a Family Birthday Tradition
Traditions and rituals are such an important part of growing up. As the oldest of five siblings, I recall always receiving a new pair of holiday pajamas every Christmas Eve and being allowed to open one gift under the tree before we went to bed. Another favorite was having picnic dinners on the beach for the first and last day of school. Some of our family traditions were those my parents experienced as kids and others they created just for the five of us.
All to say that holidays aren’t the only time to enrich your children with tradition. Birthdays can be a great opportunity to start a new tradition if you haven’t already. Some fun ideas include...
- Birthday Mail—Kids rarely receive old-fashioned "snail mail" these days, so put the word out to family and friends to send a special card to your child on their birthday. I purchase birthday cards all year long so I always have a stash to mail to my kids during their birthday week. This is especially fun for younger kids who will be eagerly anticipating checking the mailbox when their big day draws near.
- Balloons in the Bedroom—Sneak into your child’s room after they’re asleep and place a bouquet of balloons at the end of their bed, or in the bathroom, at the breakfast table, or even in the car.
- Birthday Fairy—Leave a small gift, special treat, or little note under their pillow for a surprise first thing in the morning. I still do this for my teens and college kids.
For more ideas see 5 Ways to Create Family Birthday Rituals
2. Birthday Date
Raising eight kids means living in a household that never lacks activity. There’s always plenty of action and the chances of having a lot of one-on-one time with each child has always been a work in progress.
Most of our kids have summer birthdays, so years ago their dad came up with the idea of scheduling a birthday date for each of them. Regardless of whether their birthday fell during the summer or during the school year, he made a date with each of our kids to treat them to a special day of their choice. Weeks before their birthday, the birthday child gets the wheels in motion with ideas of what he/she would like to do.
Just recently, my 17-year-old son chose a deep sea fishing excursion for the day. He had a blast! We’ve been doing this now for nearly 20 years, and it’s still something our family looks forward to and enjoys.
3. Plan a Mystery Day
Who doesn't love a good surprise? I sure do. For instance, I never found out the sex of any of our babies before they were born, I can’t resist grab bags, and I'm thrilled when a friend drops by unexpectedly for a glass of wine.
A fantastic alternative to throwing a birthday party is instead surprising your birthday boy/girl with a full day of mystery. A friend of mine does this for her twins. She starts by letting them pop some mystery balloons. Before the balloons are inflated, slip in something special: personalized notes, movie tickets, sports tickets, a voucher for an activity, dollar bills, or even candy. You can write on the balloon a time of day they get to pop them so they can look forward to popping them throughout the day. How fun is that?
She also organizes a scavenger hunt for them starting with their first clue, which she places in their bedroom in a box waiting for them when they wake up. You can be as elaborate or simple as you want with a scavenger hunt depending on your child’s age and personality. The scavenger hunt finally leads to a mystery dinner at a restaurant both kids enjoy and the birthday culminates with a cupcake and sundae bar back at their home. (Tradition!)
4. Get Sporty
Most of my kids are sports nuts. Not only do they love to play baseball, golf, soccer, and hockey, they love to go watch their favorite teams in action. We live in New England where the Boston Red Sox, Celtics, and Patriots are extremely popular. My teen and college sons would much rather have tickets to a game at Fenway Park than have a birthday party.
Sure, birthday parties are a great way to celebrate, but the important thing is that you can still show the person you care about them.
Another one of our sons is a huge fan of the outdoors and loves spending time hiking, kayaking, and fishing. His favorite birthdays involve a day trip or camping trip with a couple of his best friends.
With all the time families spend crazed and running from one commitment to another, celebrating a brand new year by doing something healthy and adventurous can be a real hit.
5. Destination Birthday
You’ve probably heard of a destination wedding where couples choose to celebrate their marriage at a gorgeous destination of their choosing away from home. Though many of these settings are exotic and tropical (and extremely expensive) there is something very romantic and exciting about having a venue that is so out of the ordinary.
Like a wedding, celebrating a birthday in a location that is in a totally different environment can create the memory of a lifetime.
Some ideas are a museum, a nearby city you’ve never visited, traveling by train for the day, an amusement park, a behind-the-scenes tour at a zoo or aquarium, visiting a relative or grandparent that you don’t get to see that often, camping, or an overnight getaway that you could incorporate into a fun road trip. My youngest daughter's birthday is in late October. Last year, air-fare rates were incredibly low, so she and I flew to New York City for the day and explored the big apple. We were home before midnight and neither of us turned into a pumpkin!
Sure, birthday parties are a great way to celebrate, but the important thing is that you can still show the person you care about them and that their birthday is important because you love them and are so happy to have them in your life. Get adventurous and find some new and creative ways to honor your birthday cherubs—cake optional!
What creative ways do you celebrate a loved one’s birthday? Share your thoughts in the comment section at quickanddirtytips.com/mighty-mommyor post your ideas on the Mighty Mommy Facebook page. You can also connect with me on Twitter @MightyMommy or email me at mommy@quickanddirtytips.com. Visit my family-friendly boards at Pinterest.com/MightyMommyQDT. Image of birthday boy © Shutterstock.
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